Blown in on the Wind
by DramaQueenFangirl
Summary: When Danny asked Clara why she traveled with the Doctor did she give him the honest truth. Or the one she wants to believe. Maybe she really did think more of the Doctor then he originally thought. WHOUFFLE ONE-SHOT


When Danny asked me why I traveled with him, I didn't know how to respond. The Doctor. there were so many answers. But I decided on the one that was most likely going to win me back his trust.

Deep down I knew what I was saying wasn't real reason I traveled with the Doctor. It wasn't to see the wonders. Well, not at first. At first it was about loneliness. I could see it in his eyes. The way his voice sounded when he first got my phone call.

Now of course I know why he was so lonely. Why he was so excited to see me. He had lost his family, his friends.

I don't think I will ever tell Danny the real truth. The wanting to get away and not be alone anymore. It all went so fast though...

That first day after the spoonheads. On the TARDIS the Doctor kept looking at me and muttering. "You died at the Dalek Asylum then in London why are you here, Clara?" I knew whenever I turned my back he would stare at me trying to find the answer. Then he took me on this amazing adventure.

I learned all about the aliens that first day. I saw the beauty of space and time. I learned to sacrifice. I learned to let go. Something about the Doctor told me it was time to stop living in the past. Yet he still did.

He left me at home for a while and I realized how much I missed him. How can you miss a total stranger? Then he came back for me. He took me to the sub during the Cold War. I learned about fear. I was truly afraid for my life. Yet I was calm. Almost like I had lived it before. Again I trusted my life to a total stranger. He had still been muttering about how I should be dead but I just ignored it.

He dropped me at home again. He kept doing that. We had the most fabulous adventure then he just left me back to be a nanny again. I kept this up. Would Danny believe me if I told him the truth. I met a total stranger over the Internet and instead of asking to get chips he took me to an alien planet.

I learned the lessons I couldn't learn anyway else. The right thing to do. How to be strong. The Doctor always did that. He would just ignore the haters and be himself.

Then all of a sudden everything had made sense. The need to help that strange man. It was me. All along we had been each other's destiny. I was supposed to save his life. Could I look Danny in the eye and say this. The reason I traveled with the Doctor was because I knew deep down I was destined to save him?

Then he would just ask me why. Why did I jump in after him. Why did I risk my life. And I knew the answer but I could not admit it. The truth behind what I did. Why I put up with that ridiculously stupid walk. And the lopsided grin. Or that bright red fez.

I had loved him. But he never could have loved me back.

I had seen his future, his past. Everything that had ever happened. I watched him as he looked the world in the eye everyday and said, "In your face!"

He beat suddenly he was just gone. He had regenerated. I could hear Danny asking again in my head. "Then why did you stay with him?" I knew I didn't love him anymore. Not in the same way. I just couldn't. But I had seen what had happened to him last time he was left alone. I couldn't do that to him. The Doctor was something special. It was thanks to him that I was where I was.

If I hadn't gotten my heart broken and lost my best friend I never would have gotten to this place. This special place where I was semi-normal and had a super hero life. So there, Danny. Thats why I travel with the Doctor. Not because I loved the sites. But because I saw a person in need and couldn't stand not helping. And before I knew it I was head over heels for a bow tie wearing alien that lit up my world. An alien who had sacrificed so much for his loved ones. He left people behind for safety. He changed his face and pretended it was okay. He acted like he was all that then broke down at the end of the day.

I changed his world while he changed mine. We gave each other hope. Then mine was taken from me like a leaf gets swept away by the wind. But he knew that.

He took the little time he had left to call me and explain. He told me that he would be way more scared then me. I couldn't bear it though. I wanted so bad to just shout that I loved him. My world suddenly lost all the hope I had because of his optimistic smile. But I couldn't tell him that. So I said I would try to accept. And I did.

The new Doctor isn't my doctor. And now I really am just in it for the sights. But every time I wonder alone down a hallway in the TARDIS she takes me to a place where I can remember him. I miss him to the end of time. But now I have something new. The wind didn't only blow out the leaf of the Doctor and my old life, but it planted the seed of something more. Something I never could have found without the Doctor breaking my heart.


End file.
